I took vacation the week of July 4th. We go where all white trash families vacation; Ocean City, Maryland. I am no longer a big fan of taking my shirt off on the beach. I am in the worst shape of my life. I also have the skin tone of 2% milk. I look a little like this.

I invented a game where we look at the pictures on the wall at the Comedy Factory and say who you think would win in a fight. According to the staff, everyone on the wall could kick my ass. That's ridiculous. I would beat the piss out of Judy Tenuta. According to Jon Mumma, Curt Shackelford is tougher than he looks.

Speaking of Curt Shackelford, I want to publicly thank him for what he does for local comedy. I give him a lot of grief. I don't like to go first, I don't like to sit up front and I like to sit on the stairs at "The" Topaz, but he is responsible for multiple venues where local comics can perform. I don't even know of anyone who runs two rooms and he runs four. Thanks Curt.

Speaking of Jon Mumma, I guess at this point his hour of crowdwork in Westminster is already folklore. I was there. It will become like Wilt's 100 point game where everyone claims to have been there. If you are not among these people you were not there: